Post Office Paula in Pant Topper Showstopper

All photos copyright Richard Banks. Reproduced with permission (and thanks!)

I suppose it was only a matter of time. Even so, the first Horizon IT Inquiry-themed post box topper to materialise in the UK is quite the talking point.

The well-executed tableau appeared overnight last night. It immortalises a crucial week of the Inquiry in May this year, when Lead Counsel Jason Beer KC questioned former Post Office CEO Paula Vennells over three days.

The topper has been placed over the post box sited outside the Morrisons/Post Office in the splendidly-named Shropshire village of Pant. It was spotted by correspondent Richard Banks, who supplied all the photos.

Beer is depicted standing at a lectern which features a card with his name on it, a stand for his papers and a microphone. Vennells is seated at a desk with a name card, a microphone and what looks like reference papers. The top sheet carries the title “Horizon”.

Mr Banks tells me he is “unable” to say who made the topper, but is reliably informed it was created with “a mixture of both knitting and crochet”.

I think it is inspired. I just hope someone doesn’t nick it. If you are the genius behind this work, please get in touch via the contact form on this website. Anonymity is guaranteed.

If you would like to read more about what happened when Jason Beer met Paula Vennells (or check to see just how accurate the Pant Topper Showstopper actually is), you can read the following on this website:

Vennells Day 1: the Five Things we learned
Vennells Day 2: Dispatches from the Bunker
Vennells Day 2: Cover-up finally acknowledged
Paula Vennells and Mark Davies: Led by the (brown) nose

You can also watch Vennells’ three day evidence session in its entirety (whilst reading along with the transcripts) on the Inquiry website, starting here.

Please note the photos on this blog post are all copyright Richard Banks.

“The account that you’ve given is very different from what the documents reveal….”
Morrisons/Pant Post Office and its newest piece of guerilla art

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29 responses to “Post Office Paula in Pant Topper Showstopper”

  1. A work of art! Inspired perhaps by what was (for many) the climactic moment of the enquiry. Deserved praise from (almost) all.

    1. As mentioned prior,this masterpiece was a mixture of knitting and crocheting, so our new guerillas could be the “knittechers”
      I hereby request, if I may, the next masterpiece will be..
      The older guy with the big afro mop of hair, or that sulky man who was dressed all in black, like Lee Van cleef in one of the westerns I saw once..
      And in homage to the stencil master of Street art , our knittechers can create “pantsies” as in…”another pantsy has been spotted in….”
      Knittechers, I salute you

  2. Made my day.absolutely brilliant crafting.well done!
    How about a light-hearted caption competition to while away the break, I am sure there will be some clever and imaginative captions!
    Here’s a quickie to start….
    “Mr beer, in the not too distant future, you will , I can assure you,find me back on the top !”

  3. Priceless! Well done to the anonymous woolsmith!

  4. A work of genius Nick. I think the next step is to get Ardman Animations to produce several Wallace and Gromit style episodes that have to focus big time on our saturnine hero – with periodic interventions by Mr Henry and his posse. But you have to write the screen play. To think P.Vennels could almost have played Wallaces stinking bishop.

  5. No room at the Enquiry for woolly thinking………….

  6. Angela Teasdale avatar

    This is superb!

  7. Someone borrow that and get it off to the 3D printers pronto!

  8. David William Scothorn avatar
    David William Scothorn

    Possession rights on the top of Post boxes are normally the province of the local W.I.

    1. No! Anyone can make a topper! Or be a crafty guerrilla!

  9. keep it up…..all of you!!!

  10. Brilliant, caption I will ask Mark Davies what to do think and say.

  11. Give the knitter a gong. Preferably the one Vennels relinquished !!!

    1. Surely not!! Who in hell would want to get THAT late Ding-Dong’s recycled Blingy Wrong Gong??

  12. John O'SULLIVAN avatar
    John O’SULLIVAN

    The trademark Beer four colour biro?

  13. Absolutely love it…..well done whoever knitted and crocheted a fabulous caricature of a critical stage of the Post Office Inquiry and for sure we can all recognise Vennells when we see her (for sure think I politely said HELLO to her at Boggle Hole 22nd June………………….en passant….as we do in Yorkshire….she had her head down and hood up and gave a rueful nod in return……..”mmmm ” I thought, ”I know those teeth…………..might be wrong”….)……………………………………………..On top of a post box is a real contextual giveaway too…………………….

    Missing the fervour of the daily updates and looking forward for return to reporting when the Inquiry returns

    cheers Nick,
    hope you are enjoying the break…..I’m busy watching ospreys at Foulshaw Cumbria…..fabulous creatures……………..

  14. Just fabuleus!
    Compliments for the maker

  15. This is so brilliant. Let’s hope it starts a trend – trying to think of good ones 🤔 that guy with the cloud on his head! Elaine Cottam! Jarmail Singh!!
    Come on, the knitting and crochet community, one outside every post office! Banksy? Who? 😄😄

    1. Absolutely wonderful.
      Different subject,
      Think we need a run off for the most useless person of the decade between Vennells and Truss.

  16. Thank you for this – very clever!

  17. I was hoping to see “word soup” feature somewhere!

    1. Yep, losing the OBE was a bit a clanger.

  18. Kay Feltham-Jones avatar
    Kay Feltham-Jones

    It’s absolutely brilliant ! Whoever made it has captured Jason Beer KC’s and Vennells’ likenesses perfectly – we’ve all seen that she does like a scarf!

  19. Gosh, looks more like Paula Vennells than Paula Vennells.

  20. Would like to see her in handcuffs being lead down to the cells when the time ( hopefully ) comes.

  21. Bill Hattersley avatar

    Brilliant! ❤️

  22. Seriously inaccurate. Not a single tear was visible. Not even a hankie!

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